Statements to think about:
"Requerimiento" drawn up, in 1537 by the Spanish court and was to be read to the Native populations by priests who accompanied the conquistadors.
"…we ask and require [that] you …acknowledge the Church as the Ruler and Superior of the whole world and the high priest called pope and in his name the King and Queen …our lords and kings of these islands… But if you do not do so, I certify to you that, with the help of God, we shall forcibly enter your country and shall make war against you in all ways and manners that we can, and shall subject you to the yoke and obedience of the Church, and of their Highnesses…"
The English had this to say in 1670:
"They are extraordinarily charitable one to another, one having nothing to spare, but he freely imparts it to his friends, and whatever they get by gaming or any other way, they share one to another, leaving themselves commonly the least amount…"
Powhatan, father of Pocahontas asked in 1609:
"Why will you take by force what you may obtain by love? Why will you destroy us who supply you with food? What can you get by war? …We are unarmed, and willing to give you what you ask, if you come in a friendly manner…"
In 1867 General William T. Sherman stated:
"The more [Indians] we can kill this year the less will have to be killed the next war, for the more I see of these Indians, the more convinced I am that they all have to be killed or be maintained as a species of paupers."
After the Little Big Horn battle Crazy Horse said:
"We had buffalo for food, and their hides for clothing and for our tipis. We preferred hunting to a life of idleness on the reservation, where we were driven against our will. At times we did not get enough to eat, and we were not allowed to leave the reservation to hunt. We preferred our own way of living. We were no expense to the government. All we wanted was peace and to be left alone. Soldiers were sent out in the winter, who destroyed our villages.
The "Long Hair" (Custer) came in the same way. They say we massacred him, but he would have done the same thing to us had we not defended ourselves and fought to the last. Our first impulse was to escape with our women and children, but we were so hemmed in that we had to fight."
Sitting Bull stated the following after he was released from Fort Randall were he was held for 19 months as a prisoner of war:
"White men like to dig in the ground for their food. My people prefer to hunt the buffalo as their fathers did. White men like to stay in one place. My people want to move their tipis here and there to the different hunting grounds. The life of white men is slavery. They are prisoners in towns or farms. The life my people want is a life of freedom. I have seen nothing that a white man has, houses or railways or clothing or food that is good as the right to move in the open country, and live in our own fashion."
On December 20, 1890 (just nine days before the Massacre of Wounded Knee occurred) L. Frank Baum, creator of the "Wizard of Oz" wrote in an editorial in the Aberdeen Saturday Pioneer:
"Why not annihilation? Their glory has fled, their spirit broken, their manhood effaced; better that they should die than live the miserable wretches they are…the whites, by law of conquest, by justice of civilization, are masters of the American continent."
The significant of the date and statement showed that even after we were placed on the reservations and were completely dependent upon the federal government for our very survival some Euro-Americans still wanted us destroyed.
The question I ask today is – Has this changed?
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
A Story About the Relationship of the Lakota Concept of "Kola"
“Kola”
Among my people there is a type of relationship between men called “Kola.” In today's world, it has lost its true meaning. This happened because everyone uses it as you would use the word friend.
The term friend however does not describe the true meaning of the Lakota concept of Kola. A Kola was much more then a friend. It was a term that meant that your Kola was closer to you then your brother. If the opportunity ever arose you would literally lay down your life for your Kola.
The best description that I know of personally was the story of my Uncle Buddy Red Bird and his Kola Norman Red Thunder. This relationship was the personification of the Lakota concept of the Kola.
My uncle was a single man with a big smile who had an infectious laugh that would make you want to join in even though you didn’t know why he was laughing. He was a friendly, outgoing, happy person who made you feel important and always welcome to sit, drink coffee and visit. He was a person who shared what he had from stories to food in the true Lakota way.
He and Red Thunder met while in boot camp during World War II and fought in five battles. To understand how significant five battles were. The men of the 101'st Airborne Division of which the "Band of Brothers" is based on were in three battles.
The story I was told, as I was growing up, was that before each battle Red Thunder would say to my uncle. “Kola, if anything happens to me—I want you to marry my wife and raise my son.” My uncle, of course always would respond by telling him that he would be alright and that they would make it home together. Well Red Thunder didn’t make it; he was killed during the last battle they were in.
Being the true Lakota and living up to the true concept of the Kola. When he returned and was discharged he went to Montana, married Red Thunder’s wife and raised his son.
As a child I loved this story – it was so romantic and yet so very sad. I've thought about my Uncle Buddy over the last two days – I wished I could have spent time with him and asked him questions about his experiences. But like so many of the men who fought in WWII he is now a memory. So during the Memorial Day weekend I try to watch a movie about that war. So this year I watched the entire ten episodes of the "Band of Brothers."
Among my people there is a type of relationship between men called “Kola.” In today's world, it has lost its true meaning. This happened because everyone uses it as you would use the word friend.
The term friend however does not describe the true meaning of the Lakota concept of Kola. A Kola was much more then a friend. It was a term that meant that your Kola was closer to you then your brother. If the opportunity ever arose you would literally lay down your life for your Kola.
The best description that I know of personally was the story of my Uncle Buddy Red Bird and his Kola Norman Red Thunder. This relationship was the personification of the Lakota concept of the Kola.
My uncle was a single man with a big smile who had an infectious laugh that would make you want to join in even though you didn’t know why he was laughing. He was a friendly, outgoing, happy person who made you feel important and always welcome to sit, drink coffee and visit. He was a person who shared what he had from stories to food in the true Lakota way.
He and Red Thunder met while in boot camp during World War II and fought in five battles. To understand how significant five battles were. The men of the 101'st Airborne Division of which the "Band of Brothers" is based on were in three battles.
The story I was told, as I was growing up, was that before each battle Red Thunder would say to my uncle. “Kola, if anything happens to me—I want you to marry my wife and raise my son.” My uncle, of course always would respond by telling him that he would be alright and that they would make it home together. Well Red Thunder didn’t make it; he was killed during the last battle they were in.
Being the true Lakota and living up to the true concept of the Kola. When he returned and was discharged he went to Montana, married Red Thunder’s wife and raised his son.
As a child I loved this story – it was so romantic and yet so very sad. I've thought about my Uncle Buddy over the last two days – I wished I could have spent time with him and asked him questions about his experiences. But like so many of the men who fought in WWII he is now a memory. So during the Memorial Day weekend I try to watch a movie about that war. So this year I watched the entire ten episodes of the "Band of Brothers."
Monday, May 25, 2009
Memorial Day and What it Means to a Lakota Woman
Memorial Day
Memorial Day was always an important event in the lives of my family. When I was a little girl I remember the hours and hours the women of my family would spend making flowers out of crape-paper. Even as a small child I was involved. They taught us how to make the simplest flowers. Those simple little flowers were set aside and on the day when the adults left for Greengrass, were most of my family is buried, we kids would walk to the "little boy's grave". The little boy was my mother's older brother who died before she was born. He died of some childhood illness when he was still a baby and was buried on a high hill over looking the Moreau River. We would walk there stand around with our little flowers, sing some songs, say the Lord's Prayer and place our flowers on the little grave, walk back thinking about what would have happened if he would have lived.
As we grew older we then made the more complicated flowers, like the red American beauty roses. A family tradition was for the person who could make the best roses would make four that would be put together and those four would be placed on the grave of my grandfather, Douglas Daniel Dupris whose favorite whiskey was Four Roses. When you consider that the women who dedicated themselves to this activity were opposed to any type of drinking. I no my grandmother never allowed an ounce of alcohol to pass by her lips – but in this tradition she was one of the main supporters. I cannot tell you how it started but it is still something that is being done today by women who still do not drink. Why? Because it's a family tradition that has been passed on for three generations and will continue through the next 10.
Memorial Day is a time when I think about all of those who have gone on and are waiting for me and my generation to join them. I also think about the changes that have taken place from the time I would make flowers from crape-paper to the beautiful silk flowers I send home to be placed on our family's graves that lay together on a hill overlooking the Moureau River Valley. My great, great grandmother Cleans As She Comes lies near her great, great, great, great grandson Benton (Hoakie) In The Woods. This little cemetery is made up of family groups. Each year the adults will tell the younger ones who is who and how they are related. Stories are told and children understand why this activity is important to continue following.
I don't know what will happen tomorrow or next year – but there is no doubt in my mind that when the time comes for me to leave my family and join the others – this is where they will bring me. I will be placed here besides these same people that I love and remember. It gives me great peace to know this. The traditions that have been passed on from one generation to the next will continue because the family will know what to do and how to do this. So each Memorial Day will come and go just as our family does – but our family will continue and this of all things gives me a sense of understanding the idea of continuity. The continuing progress of a family that goes on despite everything that can happen.
There is a Lakota saying – it goes like this. "A Lakota will always belong to a family. They may lose their mother, father, brother, sisters, etc., but they will never lose their family". To understand this you have to understand one of the simplest things about us as a people. The, Lakota unlike many other tribes do not call themselves "the human beings." We refer to ourselves as the "Allies" we are made up of families – the most important thing in the life of a Lakota is their relationship with their family. In fact that was one of the assimilation goals of the federal government was to make a Lakota realize that they could actually view themselves as separate from their families. When this happened it was easier for assimilation to take place. But this has failed just like so many of their plans and on Memorial Day is a time to celebrate the fact that we remain as families.
Memorial Day was always an important event in the lives of my family. When I was a little girl I remember the hours and hours the women of my family would spend making flowers out of crape-paper. Even as a small child I was involved. They taught us how to make the simplest flowers. Those simple little flowers were set aside and on the day when the adults left for Greengrass, were most of my family is buried, we kids would walk to the "little boy's grave". The little boy was my mother's older brother who died before she was born. He died of some childhood illness when he was still a baby and was buried on a high hill over looking the Moreau River. We would walk there stand around with our little flowers, sing some songs, say the Lord's Prayer and place our flowers on the little grave, walk back thinking about what would have happened if he would have lived.
As we grew older we then made the more complicated flowers, like the red American beauty roses. A family tradition was for the person who could make the best roses would make four that would be put together and those four would be placed on the grave of my grandfather, Douglas Daniel Dupris whose favorite whiskey was Four Roses. When you consider that the women who dedicated themselves to this activity were opposed to any type of drinking. I no my grandmother never allowed an ounce of alcohol to pass by her lips – but in this tradition she was one of the main supporters. I cannot tell you how it started but it is still something that is being done today by women who still do not drink. Why? Because it's a family tradition that has been passed on for three generations and will continue through the next 10.
Memorial Day is a time when I think about all of those who have gone on and are waiting for me and my generation to join them. I also think about the changes that have taken place from the time I would make flowers from crape-paper to the beautiful silk flowers I send home to be placed on our family's graves that lay together on a hill overlooking the Moureau River Valley. My great, great grandmother Cleans As She Comes lies near her great, great, great, great grandson Benton (Hoakie) In The Woods. This little cemetery is made up of family groups. Each year the adults will tell the younger ones who is who and how they are related. Stories are told and children understand why this activity is important to continue following.
I don't know what will happen tomorrow or next year – but there is no doubt in my mind that when the time comes for me to leave my family and join the others – this is where they will bring me. I will be placed here besides these same people that I love and remember. It gives me great peace to know this. The traditions that have been passed on from one generation to the next will continue because the family will know what to do and how to do this. So each Memorial Day will come and go just as our family does – but our family will continue and this of all things gives me a sense of understanding the idea of continuity. The continuing progress of a family that goes on despite everything that can happen.
There is a Lakota saying – it goes like this. "A Lakota will always belong to a family. They may lose their mother, father, brother, sisters, etc., but they will never lose their family". To understand this you have to understand one of the simplest things about us as a people. The, Lakota unlike many other tribes do not call themselves "the human beings." We refer to ourselves as the "Allies" we are made up of families – the most important thing in the life of a Lakota is their relationship with their family. In fact that was one of the assimilation goals of the federal government was to make a Lakota realize that they could actually view themselves as separate from their families. When this happened it was easier for assimilation to take place. But this has failed just like so many of their plans and on Memorial Day is a time to celebrate the fact that we remain as families.
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Sovereignty
"An Inherent Right to Self-Determination"
Sovereignty is the most fundamental concept that defines the relationship between the government of the United States and governments of American Indian Tribes. The following are very good explanations of what the concept of Sovereignty is:
"When the legal concept of sovereignty was first challenged in the Supreme Court by the state of Georgia in the 1820's, Chief Justice Marshall took pains to examine this legal apparatus and to explain how it functions... "Sovereignty, explained Marshall, exits as a pre-condition among self-governing entities and acts as a legal shield protecting all rights and privileges reserved and implied by nationhood. In fact, treaties were a granting of rights from the tribes, to the federal government."
-Paul VanDevelder; 1999
"...Indian tribes must act like Indians. That's the only justification for preserving internal sovereignty... if we don't bring those traditions back, then the problems those traditions solved are going to continue to grow. Then we'll have to get funding to set up programs to deal with those issues... When you set up programs, you are exercising your internal sovereignty, but the funding sources determines how the program is going to operate and then the funding source defines internal sovereignty."
-Vine Deloria
"Indian sovereignty is the principle that those powers which are lawfully vested in an Indian tribe, are not delegated powers granted by express acts of Congress, but rather inherent powers of a limited sovereignty which can never be extinguished."
-Felix Cohen, New York Supreme Court Justice, 1942
In Worcester v. Georgia, the Supreme Court ruled that Indian tribes are "distinct political communities, retaining their original rights as the undisputed possessors of the soil from time immemorial...the very term nation, so generally applied to them, means a people distinct from others, having territorial boundaries, within which their authority is exclusive, and having a right to all the lands within those boundaries, which is not only acknowledged but guaranteed by the United States."
" From its earliest days, the United States has recognized the sovereign status of Indian tribes as domestic dependent nations. Cherokee Nation v. Georgia, 30 U.S. (5 Pet.) 1, 17 (1831). Our Constitution recognizes Indian sovereignty by classing Indian treaties among the "supreme law of the land," and establishes Indian affairs as a unique area of federal concern. In early Indian treaties, the United States pledged to "protect" Indian tribes, thereby establishing one of the bases for the federal trust responsibility in our government-to-government relations with Indian tribes. These principles continue to guide our national policy towards Indian tribes."
-Office of the U.S. Attorney General, 1995
I hope this has provided enough information to began to understand the concept of American Indian tribal sovereignty.
Friday, May 22, 2009
The Lakota Belief Regarding Our Babies
This is a picture of my sister's grandchild who in the Lakota way is also my Grandchild we would say he is our "takoja" He was welcomed into our family in the Lakota tradition way before he was born. We always spoke to him when we saw his mother to let him know we were happy he chose us. The following description regarding our beliefs is described by my hunka Auntie Pat Locke.
"Wankan Yeja"
"The birth of a child was very important to the Lakota. Their word for infant is "Wankan Yeja" (Waa-kan Ya-ja) which means sacred one, consecrated one, the being endowed with a spiritual quality. The Wankan Yeja is viewed as a gift from the Creator. The ancient Lakota belief was that the Wankan Yeja looked down from the spirit world to search for its parents and family. Then, when the Wankan Yeja chose and was born, girl or boy, for the family it was a time of joy and being thankful because the family was chosen by the Wankan Yeja to come to their family. Throughout the life of the child, he or she was loved by the parents and the "tiospaye" (extended family). The parents' role from before and after birth was to convey unconditional and genuine love to the "Wankan Yeja".
(Pat Locke- Hunkpapa Lakota Tribal Elder)
"The birth of a child was very important to the Lakota. Their word for infant is "Wankan Yeja" (Waa-kan Ya-ja) which means sacred one, consecrated one, the being endowed with a spiritual quality. The Wankan Yeja is viewed as a gift from the Creator. The ancient Lakota belief was that the Wankan Yeja looked down from the spirit world to search for its parents and family. Then, when the Wankan Yeja chose and was born, girl or boy, for the family it was a time of joy and being thankful because the family was chosen by the Wankan Yeja to come to their family. Throughout the life of the child, he or she was loved by the parents and the "tiospaye" (extended family). The parents' role from before and after birth was to convey unconditional and genuine love to the "Wankan Yeja".
(Pat Locke- Hunkpapa Lakota Tribal Elder)
As you can see by his wonderful smile and happy despostion that emanates from this picture he is happy he chose our family to come to. He will be cherished from now on. It's not just because we love him but he is the child of a beloved daughter, and the grandchild of a beloved sister.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
American Indians Need To Write Books
Indian Leaders Step Up
Jodi Rave stated the following on her blog – "As Native people, we need to express our thoughts and knowledge more often." This is so true. Too often we allow others to interpret our world for us. How many books have been written by American Indians? Not many. I remember when I was in college back in the late 60's – there were none. And then all of a sudden Custer Died For Your Sins: an Indian Manifesto by Vine Deloria, Jr. showed up in book stores. I cannot describe to anyone how that made me feel. I wanted to tell everyone around that I knew him. A real Indian author. When you're young and proud of who you are its important to see and read pride reflected back to you. The easiest way this can happen is for us to write our own books.
Go to any book store and look at the Native American section. The majority of books you will find are historical books about the 1800's written by a non-Indian who is interpreting this information from a Euro-American point of view. As Indian people we complain that the people in Congress don't understand us and we have to re-educate them each legislative session. Well if they have only read about a people who existed in the 1800's do you blame them for not knowing who we are.
How do others educate these same individuals? They do it through the use of the pen. Thomas Bacon said "the pen is mightier then the sword". So how do we go about educating Congress? We hire – high cost non-Indian lobbyist to do this for us. This is not a very cost effective way of educating – we have to return and do the same every thing when someone new is elected. I'm sure the lobbyist loves the opportunities but this is not a real effective way. I'm sure there are tribes who have written there story and are effective using the pen – but they are not the norm.
Each year thousands of books appear on the book shelves and if there is one book by an American Indian I would be surprised. So why are we not taking up the challenge and using the pen to educate? I asked one of our leaders several years back - why more of our educated Indians were not writing books. He didn't have an answer. Well I challenged him to write – here was a man who was incredibly talented, was involved in some of the most important legislative activities, highly innovative and he had not written a book. This would be an outrage in the non-Indian world were every one and his uncle or auntie would be rushing to there publisher to get a million plus to write what they knew or didn't know, or point fingers and those who they say knew and failed to act.
So I have an idea. Let us say to our national Indian leaders that they will be required to write a book after they have been around for four or more years or they need to leave the stage and quite telling us what to do. This will put them in a spot if they want to stay they have to create. We could identify ghost writers who will be available to anyone who needs one. Maybe we can set up a non-profit to do this.
But the second question is who will publish these great books. Well, we know we can't depend on the large publishing houses. So my next suggestion will be to have several of the big casino tribes to get together and start a publishing company. This way we can have are frybread and eat it too. Let's get started! I can think of a number of Indian Leaders that need to stand up and produce…. This is our children's legacy that needs to be captured by us and not interpreted for us. Jodi Rave is standing up and being creative and she has my admiration for this.
Jodi Rave stated the following on her blog – "As Native people, we need to express our thoughts and knowledge more often." This is so true. Too often we allow others to interpret our world for us. How many books have been written by American Indians? Not many. I remember when I was in college back in the late 60's – there were none. And then all of a sudden Custer Died For Your Sins: an Indian Manifesto by Vine Deloria, Jr. showed up in book stores. I cannot describe to anyone how that made me feel. I wanted to tell everyone around that I knew him. A real Indian author. When you're young and proud of who you are its important to see and read pride reflected back to you. The easiest way this can happen is for us to write our own books.
Go to any book store and look at the Native American section. The majority of books you will find are historical books about the 1800's written by a non-Indian who is interpreting this information from a Euro-American point of view. As Indian people we complain that the people in Congress don't understand us and we have to re-educate them each legislative session. Well if they have only read about a people who existed in the 1800's do you blame them for not knowing who we are.
How do others educate these same individuals? They do it through the use of the pen. Thomas Bacon said "the pen is mightier then the sword". So how do we go about educating Congress? We hire – high cost non-Indian lobbyist to do this for us. This is not a very cost effective way of educating – we have to return and do the same every thing when someone new is elected. I'm sure the lobbyist loves the opportunities but this is not a real effective way. I'm sure there are tribes who have written there story and are effective using the pen – but they are not the norm.
Each year thousands of books appear on the book shelves and if there is one book by an American Indian I would be surprised. So why are we not taking up the challenge and using the pen to educate? I asked one of our leaders several years back - why more of our educated Indians were not writing books. He didn't have an answer. Well I challenged him to write – here was a man who was incredibly talented, was involved in some of the most important legislative activities, highly innovative and he had not written a book. This would be an outrage in the non-Indian world were every one and his uncle or auntie would be rushing to there publisher to get a million plus to write what they knew or didn't know, or point fingers and those who they say knew and failed to act.
So I have an idea. Let us say to our national Indian leaders that they will be required to write a book after they have been around for four or more years or they need to leave the stage and quite telling us what to do. This will put them in a spot if they want to stay they have to create. We could identify ghost writers who will be available to anyone who needs one. Maybe we can set up a non-profit to do this.
But the second question is who will publish these great books. Well, we know we can't depend on the large publishing houses. So my next suggestion will be to have several of the big casino tribes to get together and start a publishing company. This way we can have are frybread and eat it too. Let's get started! I can think of a number of Indian Leaders that need to stand up and produce…. This is our children's legacy that needs to be captured by us and not interpreted for us. Jodi Rave is standing up and being creative and she has my admiration for this.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Who is Responsible for the Protection of Tribal Sovereignty
This is an letter to the editor I wrote as part of a Tribal Leadership course I was taking 2 years ago. The idea of all of us being resposible for the protection of Tribal Sovereignty still is as important to day as it was when I wrote it. When chaos prevails and infighting is rampid people lose sight of the important things. By staying together the Buffalo were always able to protect the herd. They did this by working together and being able to count on the each other. Let us began to work together.
Who is Responsible for the Protection of Tribal Sovereignty
One of the most important issues facing every tribal leader in Indian Country is the protection of tribal Sovereignty. So how do they do this while trying to solve the problems of poverty, unemployment, drugs, etc.? This is not new; every generation has had to face this problem –from the very beginning –of first contact with the aggressive Euro-American.
So what has changed from say 100 years in the past to the present time? Well one thing –we are no longer running for our lives. Or are we? Sometimes I wonder if we still are, running for our lives – I think we are, it’s just a different type of running. We now run in circles trying to pay our bills, keep food on our tables, get to the clinic when we are sick and then wait for hours.
So how do we stop? There are answers to many of these problems, but we have to be willing to participate in solving them. One of our biggest problems is the threat against tribal sovereignty. Without sovereignty we are at the mercy of the state governments and the political whim of the day. Tribal members may believe that the protection of tribal sovereignty is the responsibility of the elected tribal leadership rather then theirs.
When one thinks about what the old hunter/warriors of our past did when they were attacked on June 25th 1876 by the 7th Calvary. Not one of them said “it’s not my responsibility it’s our leaders who have to protect our camp. No, they grabbed their rifles, bow & arrows, and jumped on their horses and charged into the battle. They never once thought about their safety, only thinking about the protection of their families.
So how does one compare the battle of the “Greasy Grass” to the battle for the protection of tribal sovereignty? The comparison is based on the idea of responsibility. Tribal members have the same responsibility for protection of tribal sovereignty that the hunter/warrior had.
So how would a tribal member protect sovereignty? One of the main ways is to “become a good relative” towards other tribal members. Robert B. Porter speaks about the critical issues that are a threat to a tribe’s sovereignty in his paper “Strengthening Tribal Sovereignty Through Government Reform: What are the Issues?” (1997-1998). One of the main problems he points out is infighting –he believes that this is a major problem for tribes and that it can literally cause the destruction of a tribe.
So if tribal members are willing to take the responsibility to be “Good Relatives” to each other infighting will become a thing of the past and people will began to work together, to solve the other problems facing the reservations. The concept of being good relatives is not new to the Lakota it is one of the main foundations of our tiyospayes. By being responsible for our behavior towards each other we can protect the sovereignty of our tribes.
Who is Responsible for the Protection of Tribal Sovereignty
One of the most important issues facing every tribal leader in Indian Country is the protection of tribal Sovereignty. So how do they do this while trying to solve the problems of poverty, unemployment, drugs, etc.? This is not new; every generation has had to face this problem –from the very beginning –of first contact with the aggressive Euro-American.
So what has changed from say 100 years in the past to the present time? Well one thing –we are no longer running for our lives. Or are we? Sometimes I wonder if we still are, running for our lives – I think we are, it’s just a different type of running. We now run in circles trying to pay our bills, keep food on our tables, get to the clinic when we are sick and then wait for hours.
So how do we stop? There are answers to many of these problems, but we have to be willing to participate in solving them. One of our biggest problems is the threat against tribal sovereignty. Without sovereignty we are at the mercy of the state governments and the political whim of the day. Tribal members may believe that the protection of tribal sovereignty is the responsibility of the elected tribal leadership rather then theirs.
When one thinks about what the old hunter/warriors of our past did when they were attacked on June 25th 1876 by the 7th Calvary. Not one of them said “it’s not my responsibility it’s our leaders who have to protect our camp. No, they grabbed their rifles, bow & arrows, and jumped on their horses and charged into the battle. They never once thought about their safety, only thinking about the protection of their families.
So how does one compare the battle of the “Greasy Grass” to the battle for the protection of tribal sovereignty? The comparison is based on the idea of responsibility. Tribal members have the same responsibility for protection of tribal sovereignty that the hunter/warrior had.
So how would a tribal member protect sovereignty? One of the main ways is to “become a good relative” towards other tribal members. Robert B. Porter speaks about the critical issues that are a threat to a tribe’s sovereignty in his paper “Strengthening Tribal Sovereignty Through Government Reform: What are the Issues?” (1997-1998). One of the main problems he points out is infighting –he believes that this is a major problem for tribes and that it can literally cause the destruction of a tribe.
So if tribal members are willing to take the responsibility to be “Good Relatives” to each other infighting will become a thing of the past and people will began to work together, to solve the other problems facing the reservations. The concept of being good relatives is not new to the Lakota it is one of the main foundations of our tiyospayes. By being responsible for our behavior towards each other we can protect the sovereignty of our tribes.
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
something I picked up from www.lifetrainingonline.com/blog/the-emotional-bank-account.htm that I thought was a great teaching. If we all could follow this advise our life would be so much easier and our families would be so much happier. I am trying to apply this to my life.
EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT
When it comes to improving and maintaining our relationships with others, Stephen Covey’s metaphor of the Emotional Bank Account
is probably one of the most powerful ideas ever created for the development of interpersonal relationships. If you’ve never heard of this, it basically means that anyone with whom we have a relationship with, whether it be our coworkers, family or friends, we maintain a personal “emotional” bank account with them. This account begins on a neutral balance. And just as with any bank account, we can make deposits and withdrawals. However, instead of dealing with units of monetary value, we deal with emotional units.
The emotional units that Covey speaks of are centered around trust. When we make emotional deposits into someone’s bank account, their fondness, trust, and confidence in us grows. And as a result our relationship develops and grows. If we can keep a positive reserve in our relationships, by making regular deposits, there will be greater tolerance for our mistakes and we’ll enjoy open communication with that person. On the contrary, when we make withdrawals and our balance becomes low or even overdrawn, bitterness, mistrust and discord develops. If we are to salvage the relationship, we must make a conscious effort to make regular deposits.
This post will discuss Covey’s six major ways of making deposits into these Emotional Bank Accounts and how we can avoid making withdrawals.
1. Understanding the Individual
In Covey’s book, seven habits of highly effective people, one of the seven habits is “seek first to understand then to be understood”. Truly understanding what others are feeling is not always that easy. We must remove ourselves from our egocentric viewpoint and put ourselves into the minds and shoes of others. I say minds and shoes because we must try to first understand the thought patterns and second walk in their shoes or empathize with them.
One of my major faults when communicating with others is, while they are talking I tend to think what I am going to say next. Truly understanding someone requires us to wholly and completely concentrate on what the other person is trying to say, not reloading, just waiting to fire off your response
2. Keeping Commitments
Certainly when we break our promises to others, we make major withdrawals from their Emotional Bank Accounts. However, keeping commitments is not just relegated to promises. It also includes things such as arriving to work and appointments on time, fulfilling our duties, and living up to every word that comes out of our mouth.
3. Clarifying Expectations
There is nothing more frustrating in a relationship than not understanding what is expected of you. Although many of us wish we could be, we are not mind readers. And because each of us sees life differently and has different backgrounds and life experiences, expecting someone to just “know” is not only unfair but completely unrealistic. It’s important that the person with whom you are dealing with, knows exactly what is expected of them. Doing this will keep them out of the dark and allow them to relate you confidently, knowing that what they are doing is in line with your expectations.
4. Attending to the Little Things
Little courtesies, kind words and warm smiles are at the heart of the little things that brighten up a relationship. It shows recognition and an awareness of others. It’s interesting, but within our relationships, if you want success, it’s the little things that really become the big things.
5. Showing Personal Integrity
Nothing is probably more damaging to a relationship, then a lack of integrity. Being that the Emotional Bank Account is based upon trust, you could essentially be doing all of the previous things, but without trust, it is to no avail. Integrity means wholeness, completeness, or soundness. In this case soundness of moral character. Integrity is the rock-solid foundation upon which all successful relationships are built.
6. Apologizing Sincerely When We Make a Withdrawal
Granted, we are all mortal. We make mistakes. That’s part of life and learning. Knowing when you are wrong and admitting your mistakes prevents the wounds that you’ve caused in others from festering and allows them to heal. When appropriate, sincere apology will keep your relationships accounts in the positive, allowing you to maintain the balance that has been created in your application of all of the previous steps.
I hope this has given everyone something to think about.......
EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT
When it comes to improving and maintaining our relationships with others, Stephen Covey’s metaphor of the Emotional Bank Account
is probably one of the most powerful ideas ever created for the development of interpersonal relationships. If you’ve never heard of this, it basically means that anyone with whom we have a relationship with, whether it be our coworkers, family or friends, we maintain a personal “emotional” bank account with them. This account begins on a neutral balance. And just as with any bank account, we can make deposits and withdrawals. However, instead of dealing with units of monetary value, we deal with emotional units.
The emotional units that Covey speaks of are centered around trust. When we make emotional deposits into someone’s bank account, their fondness, trust, and confidence in us grows. And as a result our relationship develops and grows. If we can keep a positive reserve in our relationships, by making regular deposits, there will be greater tolerance for our mistakes and we’ll enjoy open communication with that person. On the contrary, when we make withdrawals and our balance becomes low or even overdrawn, bitterness, mistrust and discord develops. If we are to salvage the relationship, we must make a conscious effort to make regular deposits.
This post will discuss Covey’s six major ways of making deposits into these Emotional Bank Accounts and how we can avoid making withdrawals.
1. Understanding the Individual
In Covey’s book, seven habits of highly effective people, one of the seven habits is “seek first to understand then to be understood”. Truly understanding what others are feeling is not always that easy. We must remove ourselves from our egocentric viewpoint and put ourselves into the minds and shoes of others. I say minds and shoes because we must try to first understand the thought patterns and second walk in their shoes or empathize with them.
One of my major faults when communicating with others is, while they are talking I tend to think what I am going to say next. Truly understanding someone requires us to wholly and completely concentrate on what the other person is trying to say, not reloading, just waiting to fire off your response
2. Keeping Commitments
Certainly when we break our promises to others, we make major withdrawals from their Emotional Bank Accounts. However, keeping commitments is not just relegated to promises. It also includes things such as arriving to work and appointments on time, fulfilling our duties, and living up to every word that comes out of our mouth.
3. Clarifying Expectations
There is nothing more frustrating in a relationship than not understanding what is expected of you. Although many of us wish we could be, we are not mind readers. And because each of us sees life differently and has different backgrounds and life experiences, expecting someone to just “know” is not only unfair but completely unrealistic. It’s important that the person with whom you are dealing with, knows exactly what is expected of them. Doing this will keep them out of the dark and allow them to relate you confidently, knowing that what they are doing is in line with your expectations.
4. Attending to the Little Things
Little courtesies, kind words and warm smiles are at the heart of the little things that brighten up a relationship. It shows recognition and an awareness of others. It’s interesting, but within our relationships, if you want success, it’s the little things that really become the big things.
5. Showing Personal Integrity
Nothing is probably more damaging to a relationship, then a lack of integrity. Being that the Emotional Bank Account is based upon trust, you could essentially be doing all of the previous things, but without trust, it is to no avail. Integrity means wholeness, completeness, or soundness. In this case soundness of moral character. Integrity is the rock-solid foundation upon which all successful relationships are built.
6. Apologizing Sincerely When We Make a Withdrawal
Granted, we are all mortal. We make mistakes. That’s part of life and learning. Knowing when you are wrong and admitting your mistakes prevents the wounds that you’ve caused in others from festering and allows them to heal. When appropriate, sincere apology will keep your relationships accounts in the positive, allowing you to maintain the balance that has been created in your application of all of the previous steps.
I hope this has given everyone something to think about.......
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Since I began by mentioning my Aunties I'll continue on this subject by posting a poem I wrote.
My Mother and her Sisters
My mother had four sisters who liked to laugh
when they got together. Big hardy laughter
that came all the way from down deep inside.
From a place that stored both happiness and pain.
they didn’t laugh they roared.
I sometimes wonder what it was that they laughed at.
I never listened to the talk. I just loved to listen
to their laughter.
In fact the term laughter seems to constrict what
came out of these women. It doesn’t seem to capture
the hurricane force of the sound these women could
make together. Maybe female Elephants trumpeting
comes close, but not really.
This sound that still reverberates through my mind.
It makes me want to join in after all of these years—
I can still see them sitting around my aunt Helen’s
living room. Like large lionesses lounging around
in the hot sun under some large shade tree. Licking
their young and roaring.
My mother would throw her head back and let out
this incredible sound of pure unrestricted and
un-inhibited music from way down deep. It would
literally explode into the air.
That sound gave me such an amazing sense of joy
when I heard these five powerful women laughing.
I wanted to wrap myself up and roll around the floor
with that sound. I would find myself giggling
uncontrollably never knowing what they were laughing at.
You see they spoke to each other in the Lakota language.
Trying to describe them to someone seems to diminish
them. It’s just beyond my grasp. I find my mind reaching
or big words that can describe big women.
They were big in every sense of the word big. They all
tipped the high end of the scales. All together making
up at least a thousand pounds with ease. You can
safely say they loved food as well as laughing.
But even more important was their pride in being Lakota.
In the days that they had come of age this was not
acceptable –they were suppose to have been assimilated.
After all they had gone through the assimilation factory
called the Boarding school. The one place that was given
the authority to “kill the Indian to save the child.”
These women embodied the spirit of Lakota Womanhood
in the truest sense of the concept.
The new Lakota woman who was needed so our people
could survive. The kind that could grab on to the future
and push their children through its doors while retaining
as much of the Lakota philosophy and traditional beliefs
possible.
I loved each one of these women and thank them for the
gifts they gave me.
My aunt Aurelia gave me love.
My aunt Helen taught me courage.
My aunt Alberta taught me respect.
My aunt Eunice gave me wisdom. And
My mother, Marie blessed me with the
gift of love for my family.
They all showed me through their example to love and
care for our people.
So these are the gifts that I have carried through my
adult life and when times are hard they also gave me
the most beautiful gift of all and that is the ability to
laugh with out restraint. To laugh with the explosive
force that will make other people smile when they hear it.
Mary Lee Johns
Lakota
My Mother and her Sisters
My mother had four sisters who liked to laugh
when they got together. Big hardy laughter
that came all the way from down deep inside.
From a place that stored both happiness and pain.
they didn’t laugh they roared.
I sometimes wonder what it was that they laughed at.
I never listened to the talk. I just loved to listen
to their laughter.
In fact the term laughter seems to constrict what
came out of these women. It doesn’t seem to capture
the hurricane force of the sound these women could
make together. Maybe female Elephants trumpeting
comes close, but not really.
This sound that still reverberates through my mind.
It makes me want to join in after all of these years—
I can still see them sitting around my aunt Helen’s
living room. Like large lionesses lounging around
in the hot sun under some large shade tree. Licking
their young and roaring.
My mother would throw her head back and let out
this incredible sound of pure unrestricted and
un-inhibited music from way down deep. It would
literally explode into the air.
That sound gave me such an amazing sense of joy
when I heard these five powerful women laughing.
I wanted to wrap myself up and roll around the floor
with that sound. I would find myself giggling
uncontrollably never knowing what they were laughing at.
You see they spoke to each other in the Lakota language.
Trying to describe them to someone seems to diminish
them. It’s just beyond my grasp. I find my mind reaching
or big words that can describe big women.
They were big in every sense of the word big. They all
tipped the high end of the scales. All together making
up at least a thousand pounds with ease. You can
safely say they loved food as well as laughing.
But even more important was their pride in being Lakota.
In the days that they had come of age this was not
acceptable –they were suppose to have been assimilated.
After all they had gone through the assimilation factory
called the Boarding school. The one place that was given
the authority to “kill the Indian to save the child.”
These women embodied the spirit of Lakota Womanhood
in the truest sense of the concept.
The new Lakota woman who was needed so our people
could survive. The kind that could grab on to the future
and push their children through its doors while retaining
as much of the Lakota philosophy and traditional beliefs
possible.
I loved each one of these women and thank them for the
gifts they gave me.
My aunt Aurelia gave me love.
My aunt Helen taught me courage.
My aunt Alberta taught me respect.
My aunt Eunice gave me wisdom. And
My mother, Marie blessed me with the
gift of love for my family.
They all showed me through their example to love and
care for our people.
So these are the gifts that I have carried through my
adult life and when times are hard they also gave me
the most beautiful gift of all and that is the ability to
laugh with out restraint. To laugh with the explosive
force that will make other people smile when they hear it.
Mary Lee Johns
Lakota
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Title Change
I must admit I was so excited to get started I made a mistake and renamed my blog. So this post is to make sure I have the name straight. The name of this Blog is "They Come To See Her" in honor of my Aunt Aurelia.
Comes To My House
Comes To My House
My son has encouraged me to start a blog for years and share what it is I share with many of my friends on an ongoing basis. Both he and my daughter believe I have something to share with others. So here it is. My Blog.My two Aunties Aurelia Reddest and Eunice Larrabee had similar Indian names. My Aunt Aurelia's was "They Come To See Her" and my Aunt Euncie's was "Comes To Her House". In honor of both of these women who meant so much to me and influenced who I am - I've named this blog "Comes To My House". The idea is to encourage people to come to this blog as a place to visit and see what I have to say about subjects I'm interested in sharing. It will be a place to come and share your thoughts and ideas about subjects that are of interest to you. The idea is to have a place I'm describing as follows: An American Indian Humanities blog that deals with art, history, poetry, philosophy, politics, personal stories and everyday home life of a Lakota Grandmother.
My son has encouraged me to start a blog for years and share what it is I share with many of my friends on an ongoing basis. Both he and my daughter believe I have something to share with others. So here it is. My Blog.My two Aunties Aurelia Reddest and Eunice Larrabee had similar Indian names. My Aunt Aurelia's was "They Come To See Her" and my Aunt Euncie's was "Comes To Her House". In honor of both of these women who meant so much to me and influenced who I am - I've named this blog "Comes To My House". The idea is to encourage people to come to this blog as a place to visit and see what I have to say about subjects I'm interested in sharing. It will be a place to come and share your thoughts and ideas about subjects that are of interest to you. The idea is to have a place I'm describing as follows: An American Indian Humanities blog that deals with art, history, poetry, philosophy, politics, personal stories and everyday home life of a Lakota Grandmother.
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